fortyoz. to freedom

omg...not to sound like I've hit rock bottom but my bottom feels like a rock. I was up all night playing beer pong for my friend monica's graduation. That game is disgusting but there's nothing like having friends who're still in highschool to get you to do dumb stuff. XD I obviously feel young again after sleeping on concrete floor and waking up with a gigantic bruise on my ribs...what the heck happened?

Anywhoo, portfolio time..round three. Tis a small portfolio and I barely managed to print out three books in one shot but...well its said and done, lets try it again. Wish me luck. ;p

Clone me!

know what's no fun? everything...but what's more not fun then all of that? Strep! that's what. Strep is by far the worst non fun thing you can catch on a saturday night and sit at home and cry about how all your friends are still out having fun. Only they're not out having fun, no you'll find out a week later that they are in fact at home with the strep too. That's how unfun it is.

Alls for me to do now is take my meds, cough up a lung, run on a fever high, attempt to paint, and make marlon brando or christopher walken impersonations as my air passage condenses. whoo-hoo!!

palace of mirrors

sigh... it's crunch time again. I just love to torture myself with impossible deadlines, I can't wait to have a boss who thinks he/shes being too rough on me. ha ha ha. Other than that, I'm all over the place with my new portfolio. I finally decided on a theme but when the infatuation died down, I'm cautious that my designs are to 'girly'. nooooes why did I have to be born a woman! ...and amercian? I'm doomed to produce crapp and nothing else!

well... this next try will tell. If I get rejected AGAIN? then there really is something wrong with me. lol

it's still here!

ho ho ho when life treats you bad there is but one blog still untainted enough for me to dwell in. yeah I'm so glad this thing is still here and the major fact that NOONE READS IT HAHAHAHAAA. It's like that secret-whisper story from 2046. A place for me to utter my cryptic pleas from the outside world into the abyssmal side of the internet.

Today, I don't know what my problem is!

Here then

which is worse:
describing something you can't see?
or seeing something you can't describe?

SEEDS!

like a fiend, I ate pumpkin seeds.


I was surprised to find out that people actually look at this blog, muwhahaha. Asking why I haven't posted anything new... well truth be told, I'm drawing less and less. I spend a lot of time coding html (self taught) I actually think from time to time that could be my day job, as much as I do it. blahhh

I think I'm just really burnt after the first round of commissions. I almost ALMOST want to shut it down... already. I needed some kind of psuedo job for here-say because I don't have money that would allow me to have a real place for creativity which would allow me to have a real job...which defeats the purpose in the first place. ehhhruuuu? I'm so confused by my own issues. I used to feel depressed but I kind of enjoy dropping the ball all over again just to see how far it rolls.

On a side note. I'm SERIOUSLY debating a 'dream journal'. I dream...constantly and I have a mind like a steel-trap so it'd be easy to pod-cast my dreams via blog. wouldn't that be nice, something for you all to read on a daily basis! my un-censored subconcious creative mind...from which the majority of my inspiration comes from. whooooo.

lacking there of

I miss my computer, but above all I miss my health. Looks like I've concocted the flu, so early in the season too. I wish I was never sick. They should just strap me in a plastic bubble if that were any help. :( so all my art is going putzy and I'm doing nothing but MS paintings. darnit, I was doing so good for so long and then PUHHHh! oh well, just a minor setback!